| Grinding gears... |
[Jan. 27th, 2010|02:53 am] |
| [ | Current Location |
| | Home again. Finally. | ] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| |  confused | ] |
| [ | Current Music |
| | III - Concrete Jungle | ] |
Okay, so the good news is that I'm working again. The bad news? I'm working. Again.
Seems like the work schedule is somewhat spontaneous, in that it begins at 10:30 am, but just ends whenever. Lately, that's gotten me home between 5-7 am, asleep between 7-8 am, and then awake sometime between 3-5 in the afternoon. Doesn't make bus travel work well for doing... anything else at all, really.
And I had a feeling it would become an issue sooner or later - and of course it has - now that I'm on days off. Apparently during my off-time, I'm expected to instantly revert to days awake/nights asleep. Doable, except that part of rolling back around. I do NOT want to have a day like Thursday that goes like:
6-8 am? Wake up. Work around house/yard.
1-2 pm? Nap.
5-6 pm? Awake for dinner.
8-9 pm? Awake getting ready for work.
10 pm - 5-7 am Friday? Work.
6-8 am Friday? Soonest time I can get some REAL sleep.
Especially if I have to be mindful/aware during that work shift, and believe me, I do! It's solid labor, no stopping or slowing down. And on 3-4 hours of sleep in a full 24-hr period? Seriously?! I'm not sixteen anymore, I don't see that going well.
Psh. It's nearly 3 am now, and I'm still doing laundry as it is. |
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| Starting my new job today... |
[Jan. 19th, 2010|09:06 pm] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| |  busy | ] |
...moving freight at WinCo. Working tomorrow night too, so I'll be missing this week's BDDR meetup. Also, finally getting resituated at home again. Hope everybody's doing well! |
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| (no subject) |
[Jan. 13th, 2010|03:11 pm] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| |  contemplative | ] |
| [ | Current Music |
| | Dave Wise / Big Boss Blues | ] |
( Local news is full of epic suckage... )
Well, at least I'm making this week's BDDR meetup! :)
Personally, this new year's been the best one in a long, long time. Physical and emotional damage control is pretty much wrapped up. My folks and I should be back in our regular home within a week or two now. We've all been enjoying gaming together (like Tiger Woods '08; not really my thing, but it's something we can all get into. They've even started taking a liking to Rock Band! We'll see how that plays out...) My brother's gotten his car and insurance back up to speed; and the Grandmas are all doing mostly well - Lola's selling her trailer (the one she shared with my Pa) soon, and my brother and I will be helping get it in shape. In return, she said she'd do what she can to get my car up to speed, too. :)
Financial damage control is about all that's left to handle now; and that's just gonna come down to shrinking our lifestyles to fit (for the most part). Maybe getting back into a smaller place and getting out from under the hulking mortgage that, in spite of the law, IndyMac is STILL refusing to actually give my family any REAL HELP with. And work/employment? Well, that's something that this generation is probably going to have to redefine, I'm afraid.
I come out of all of this, and other more common news/events with really mixed feelings. Like whether or not morality and success aren't a complete antithesis of one another. Or sobriety and "social attractiveness." If there's any leaders out there we can still have any faith in, or any faith-worthy people to be a real leader. But still very much glad that I haven't gotten into any problems deeper than I am; and that my life and situation could easily be so much worse than it is. |
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| Writer's Block: Reflections |
[Dec. 29th, 2009|01:45 pm] |
You know, just the other day, I was staring at the headlines and watching the news reports... all saying it's a year to forget, and to put behind us. My year, personally, I would LOVE to do that with. My whole family's, in fact. But as a nation, this year is of drastic importance!
This year perfectly illustrates the consequences of allowing our lives to be controlled by sex, money, fame, and political and corporate power. This is what happens when we decide that lying to get ahead is just "part of the game," and everything becomes dependent on financial and sexual manipulation, secrecy and deception. WE ALL END UP FUCKED. Yes, even the wealthy and celebrities aren't immune to this stuff.
Seriously, I think everybody should be forced to study this year for ONE TERM of High School or Middle School; JUST to see what comes out of it.
The president or government can't be "the change" we need. WE have to be that change. Unless you LOVED this last year, and want a bunch more like it! (If so, I'd REALLY love to hear from YOU on this.)
( quick poll )
If anybody needs me, I'll be taking a hike in the Appalachans. |
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| (no subject) |
[Dec. 18th, 2009|01:03 pm] |
What? Not rated M for Mature yet?
Hangin' in. Looking for work still. Somebody save "Write on Time II!" It's across from the old 3D arcade in EHM, which has moved to VP, now. And it's sadly close to dying! Though it has some good titles still in stock. If you know of any irritating Naruto/Bleach fangasmers, gift central is right there. |
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| Why am I still gone!?eleventyone!? |
[Dec. 16th, 2009|12:21 pm] |
| [ | Current Location |
| | outside | ] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| |  gloomy | ] |
| [ | Current Music |
| | Sonic Team - Chemical Plant Zone | ] |
So Grandma's back up and about, and doing rather well now. I'm occupying a back-bedroom of a rental house my parents are in, because our usual one is STILL in disrepair. Apparently, the insurance checks have to clear the mortgage company before they can applied to the repairs, and the mortgage company is being stingy and holding them up. Like, a LOT. Plus, the rental agreement expires on the 23rd, and the carpet installation hasn't even begun over there yet. The house is going under, so they're already planning to short-sale it, and expunge the remaining debt, before the market goes into it's inevitable "deflation period," making things even worse.
So here I am, in a place with ONE digital-antenna TV (digi antennas are crap, btw. Half the time we don't even pick up CBS/ABC, and practically 80% of what I watch comes on one or the other), and no cable. No internet. No gaming at all. Not even a landline phone! And of course, the mounting tension and pressure of living with them again; more high-strung than ever.
Bill gets a job offer to start in 2 weeks, and goes to put in his 2-week notice. They drop him on the spot, and apparently the first job is still being offered to other candidates! So he's really pissed now, and I don't blame him. It's like what happened after Wal-Mart with me, all over again.
What more can I say? Best. Year. Ever.
Education. Employment. Civility. Family. Fail't. Is there nothing else I can really put any faith into?
I really want to help get all of us out of this disaster, but it's pretty much coming down to two options, it seems. Either I MUST find a way to resituate myself, out of my family's continued influence, or I may be forced to destroy this disastrous situation before it destroys me. :(
BONUS: In my time away, I discovered that my "uncle," Roy Jr., was in fact, the schoolyard blowhard that used to give me shit all the time in elementary school. That Bill has momma issues, hence his friction with me; he actually DOES see the same thing in my mom that I do, which is really fuckin' creepy... but not really his fault. He was practically raised by "two dads," one with a dick and one without one.
And why? Why all of everything that's going on today? I know about that too, but that's deep enough for it's own entry. Maybe next week, if things go well.
I really should stop saying stuff like that! ^.^' |
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| Damage control. Maybe. Almost. Over. "!". |
[Nov. 17th, 2009|02:23 pm] |
I've missed you guys, too.
Now I get to look forward to that "sorta awkward starting everything all over again, again" part. AGAIN. Yippee.
Next time the world comes crashing down around me, maybe I should just let it crash instead.
Also, there's a new Career Services Center opening here, where the Melodrama used to be. Go figure. |
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| AAAAH! I've fallen into 1976 and I can't get out! |
[Sep. 6th, 2009|01:09 am] |
No, seriously; I'm watching over my bedridden Grandma. There's no internet access there, and I don't have cellphone minutes very often, now. She's expected to be better by around Halloween. Or so I hope. I might be gone awhile. I'm pretty much the only relative left that's in any position to help her, too.
On the bright side, it gets me out of the toxic house. |
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| Over the river and through the woods... |
[Aug. 24th, 2009|09:14 am] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| |  calm | ] |
Going to visit my Grandmas tomorrow. The Great-Grammy's been wrestling with pain a bit lately, and I need to talk with someone on that side of the family to find out why my Pa's grave has no headstone (yet?). We were just up there today to do some grave-grooming and noticed it.
It DOES involve me crossing the Kern River, and going through a small grove around Riverwalk Park.
In other sucky news, my DDR EXTREME (USA) savegame is corrupted. ~.~ I may just leave "Memories" locked this time. |
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| Up all night... |
[Aug. 15th, 2009|03:32 am] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| | rejuvenated | ] |
Well, this trip HAS been a nice, relaxing break from everyday struggles. Not quite as socially inclined as I'd like it... or my life right now, to be. But it's nothing to complain about. So here in just a day or two, I'll be on my way back to town. Back to... business as usual... monkey business, or it might as well be!
I've been getting some reasonable, tangible things I'd like to accomplish going on in my head again. Which is really good, considering I'd spent a good amount of time really lost and directionless lately. Especially in this last month. Some little things include a newer kind of TV, an XBox 360 (and some kind of DDR/Fighter-friendly replacement controller, ASAP!), and getting it online/broadband. Getting my car fixed and/or replaced. MAYBE, just maybe getting into a place of my own by the end of the year. (Somewhere coastal, but accessible is looking very good right about now! Even midtown would be a step in the right direction, though.) Getting my computer fixed up and upgraded soon is a must, too.
I'd also like to whip up the rest of my Zmix Project, the Rockman Supreme project (corresponding with song updates like these? HELL YEAH.), and a DDR marathon video project off the ground, as well. Maybe see myself as part of a happy, attractive, fun-loving, exciting and playful couple even. Stranger things have happened, I'm sure.
I also really want that kind of light-hearted, fun-loving relationship with more of my family, but they just aren't that way most of the time... I can do my side of things all I want, that's not going to change the way they are. So that part might just be out of my hands; and maybe the best I can do is to not let the way they are constrict me so much. But then, I haven't really been to out-and-about around here, either... so maybe part of it IS me. :|
9.9 Now, for the fun part. Determining exactly how I'm going to accomplish all of this by year's end, given fickle markets/employment, while balancing responsibilities, and being there for my family when they need me. And believe me, I get the feeling THEY WILL.
( Music: Wood Man (MMX2 remix) / KoD83 (kazi) vs. U-DON ) |
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| Writer's Block: Proven by Science |
[Aug. 12th, 2009|08:51 pm] |
Doesn't seem like people do, anymore. :b
The irony of science is that the only thing it ultimately proves, is how many things there are that we DON'T understand. If anything, life proves science, not the other way around. ;) |
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| REALISATION... |
[Aug. 10th, 2009|04:29 pm] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| |  nerdy | ] |
| [ | Current Music |
| | Dragon Blade / Kozo Nakamura | ] |
 |
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| Writer's Block: Memo to Myself |
[Aug. 10th, 2009|03:54 pm] |
Ummm... don't look so forward? *lol*
Well. Got word from Mom, mixed news. Well first off, I need to refill my phone, and I'm within my last $40 with about a week to go here. Apparently now I'm getting mail, the DMV somehow screwed up getting my DL renewal mailed out, but managed to get another registration billing through. Motherfuckers. And apparently now ALL of my student loan debt has been consolidated and capitalized in a single, overwhelming $18,xxx bill.
Mom is going to Denver for a couple of weeks in September now, because Grandma Edie is getting bypass surgery (for the 2nd time), so she might be there a whole month, leaving Bill and I - alone together - for half to a whole month - in either a hotel (if the renovation gets that far), or in the third of our house that's left. >.> With me being obviously, and irrepairably broke, in the meantime.
Watch us end up storming D.C., too. XD
I THOUGHT THIS WACKY SHIT WAS OVER WITH ALREADY!! |
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| Construction paper. |
[Aug. 9th, 2009|03:55 pm] |
| [ | Current Location |
| | Huntington Beach, CA | ] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| | down | ] |
| [ | Current Music |
| | Zmix 09 (Heavenly) - Nightime | ] |
( Blabbering. Free to ignore. )
__________
I guess work on the kitchen back home is going slowly, as is my brother's thumb recovery. Grandma Jerry's hip replacement has gone well, though she may need a hand getting stuff down low, like tending her gardens. Grandma Lola's headed to a coastal getaway of her own right now, she sure needs one.
And I may be in a bit of luck, as my Aunt Ellen wants some videogame tutoring so she can better interact with their other little grandchildren. :) They're really smart and cool, too; I never did get to spend enough time with them... so that's something I CAN (and really do) look forward to.
Now, I just need some new teeth, and a way to make myself taller/more wealthy. (I get the feeling there's a cause-and-effect with that, and it might be a little backwards in it's execution. But hopefully, effective!) |
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| Southern comfort... |
[Aug. 3rd, 2009|11:04 am] |
| [ | Current Location |
| | Huntington Beach, CA | ] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| |  peaceful | ] |
| [ | Current Music |
| | Take A Chance / neuras | ] |
So here, I've finally got set up, and I'm relaxing a bit, enjoying the sights and such around Huntington Beach, where I'm house-sitting for a friend of mine. (Hence the hiatus from posting.) Already been out and about a little bit, and for the most part, it's really nice here. Especially the weather, since it's not crazy hot by the coast like it is inland.
Ironically, for a subset of L.A. County, this is probably one of the most beautiful and environmentally friendly places I've ever seen. Cars aren't overbearing the roads, and seeing people travel by bike isn't uncommon. The air is constantly fresh, between the coastal breeze and not being surrounded by smog-trapping mountains. And though they much stick to themselves a lot, much of the people here are really polite and courteous.
This would be a nice place to live. I would suggest checking it out sometime, if you haven't. And also, I have enviously missed YET ANOTHER ComicCon and AnimeExpo this year. *sigh* I'm beginning to wonder if that's EVER gonna change! Still, not a bad time to be me.
I haven't heard a whole lot from my family, lately. I hope (and trust) that they're doing okay... I get the feeling the only time I WOULD hear from them, is if something's terribly wrong.
I'll be getting back to town sometime on the 17th. |
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| Writer's Block: Do Not Open Until 2059 |
[Aug. 3rd, 2009|11:01 am] |
THIS.
Can you believe they actually make it all the way through? Bear in mind, anything that scores points = autofail, as illustrated early on. Freakin' NUTS! :D |
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| Writer's Block: Total Eclipse of the Sun |
[Jul. 22nd, 2009|08:54 am] |
A new beginning, which my life, and many of those I know right now desperately needs at the moment! (And this time, hoping to God that they DON'T feel that way.) |
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